Saturday, July 25, 2009

We Will Overcome

Oh my fucking god! The horror! Those imperialist, white, sons of bitches, how dare they insult us?

I mean, is there no sense of decency and good conduct left in those white chaps? How could they frisk a VVIP/VIP exempted from pre-embarkation security checks as recorded in the BCAS Circular No. 6/2008. What kind of a world do we live in where airline staff doesn’t read BCAS Circulars issued by the Sarkar. And it wasn’t an ordinary frisking, mind you. Oh no, not all. They went all out, they did--they even, and I hang my head in shame as I write this, asked him to open his shoes. Open his shoes! The nerve of those chaps.

The airlines “defence” for this vile deed made the decadence of Western culture quite clear. They nonchalantly stated that this sort of VVIP list is incompatible with US norms—even former US heads of state, for example, would be frisked. That is why we must protect ourselves from the depravity that the West brings. Imagine if this sort of culture took root among Indians. What would happen if we did not respect Very Very Important People and did not read government circulars? Who would our cars stop for on the road for hours on end? Who would our bridges, roads and public toilets be named after? On whose security would we spend millions while we get by with little or no law and order?

But we seem to be holding on to our culture quite well, as this incident shows, thank god. Kalam getting his footwear opened was discussed in Parliament, the Sarkar threatened to file an FIR against the airline and even issued a statement where it referred to our former president and VVIP-for-life as “Shri Abdul Kalam Azad”, respectfully fusing the missile-man’s name with the name of independent India's first education minister, Maulana Abul Kalam Azad.

In the end, though, the bastards did have to apologise for their impropriety. But they did make a song and dance of it—the apology came three months after the sinful deed of getting a VVIP to open his shoes was done. Till Thursday, Kalam had said that he had received no apology. “I've not yet received it,” were his golden words, words which will be framed at airports throughout the country as a warning to those who would dare to mistake a VVIP for a normal human being. Of course, that the airline would buckle was a fait accompli—they were never a match for the VVIPs of India, no one is. They’ve apologised to the former president for any "misunderstanding and/or inconvenience related to the security screening on April 21”.

Ha! We showed them.


nobody said...

as usual youve hit the nail on the head in your suberb style.

what to do, we are like that only!

ProudIndian said...

But dude, aren't we the reason for which they are VVIPs. they are the ones who kill and torture the common people, burn houses and yet it is they who need NSG security guards for their security. Irony of being an Indian.

Anonymous said...

We can't get his name right but we can sure make noise...

But on a separate note, u sure, Bill Clinton would be similarly frisked by the US airliner. Bush maybe :)

I may be sounding lame but I mean, would you seriously think Kalam would carry a knife or something in his shoe?

Abhishek Pathak said...

this incident happened on april 21st right..?so.where was all the hoolah back then??

the hypocrisy of the media reflects the mindset of the people..hollow respect..lame shouts.

Hades said...


That ways it's highly unlikely that Ramesh Powar would carry a knife in his shoe or, for that matter, Chetan Bhagat. Should they be exempt too?

Anonymous said...

Ya I know, I guess, I'm still finding the Babudom principles instilled in me, hard to forget!

IndianLiberals said...

Well said. Love your sarcasm :)

But India's response to Kalam's frisking isn't a surprise. We even raised hell when a mediocre actor (a certain Shahrukh Khan) was frisked in the US.