Mumbai Police Smash Crime with Raid on Party

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In a daring raid (here is the staid version of the story), Mumbai police busted a rave party in the wee hours of Monday. The rave was apparently not your ordinary walk-on-the-grass with the relatives of the high and mighty of Bollywood—even Shakti Kapoor's son was present there—being involved in this heinous act of debauchery 

The raid was carried out by a crack team from the anti-narcotics department who were shocked by the depravity they witnessed. Says a constable who didn’t wish to be named:” I am an honest (sic) middle class cop. Plus I’m Marathi, so what I saw there shocked me. Drugs, sex and alcohol all around. Plus I saw a young man, undoubtedly under the influence of hard drugs, doing a macabre dance dressed only in his loose striped chaddis and a banyan and carrying out unspeakable acts with his nara. The horror!” 

Shakti Kapoor is shocked to hear of the raid

In what must be a rare occurrence, the Mumbai police have received plaudits from citizens for ignoring all other crimes and concentrating on the drug habits of the rich and famous. 

Mumbaikar, Ravi Kumar says, “Hats off to the Mumbai police. Bombay had 212 murders and 198 rapes last year. Any lesser police force would have concentrated on these so-called “serious” crimes, but I’m proud that my police force ignores these crimes and goes for what’s really important—the morals of rich little spoilt brats.”

 Rajkumar is grateful to the Mumbai police for bettering his life by carrying out that raid

 

The police though have faced some flak from Bollywood for its “heavy-handedness”. 

A police officer explains that there is “no heavy- heavy-handedness here at all. The Narcotics Act empowers us to book adults taking drugs. The problem with these “adult” Indians is that they start thinking they are actual adults. Just because an "adult" can decide who will rule the country doesn’t mean he can take decisions like whether he can smoke marijuana. He’s not adult enough to take that decision. We policemen have to take that decision for them. It’s quite a burden, you know, playing papa to these people, but somebody has to take the responsibility, I guess.”