Raju Chacha

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In a rational move which smacks overtly of common sense, MNS cadre have bought the capital city of Maharashtra to a standstill, to protest against non-Maharashtrians.

Says a local level leader of the MNS,”These non-Maharashtrians were destroying Mumbai’s culture and ethos. Now you know that we Maharashtrians are second to none. So we said:’ they’ve destroyed the culture and ethos of the city; big deal! We’ll destroy the city itself! That’ll show them! Ha!’”

In a bid to prove that Maharashtrians can destroy stuff better than Hindi-speakers, MNS cadre went on a rampage in Mumbai, first setting fire to buses, allegedly because the buses did not speak Marathi. They followed that up by targeting taxis and auto rickshaws which did not speak Marathi.

The violence was not confined to Mumbai though; it justifiably spread to other parts of Maharashtra, including Pune—capital of the once-mighty Peshwa Empire.

“Pune once challenged the mighty Mughal Empire! Today we Maharashtrians will pelt three Pune Municipal Transport buses with stones to show how great we are. Jay Maharashtra!”, said an MNS leader in Pune, trying to incite a crowd to riot.

Taking a cue from their Maharshtrian brethren, in another extremely sensible, tit-for-tat move, Biharis have taken to destroying railway property in Bihar, including trains and railway stations. Protesters set the Motihari Railway station, in Bihar, on fire as well as attacking several Bihar-bound trains.

“How dare these Maharashtrians inconvenience Biharis”, raged a rioter, while trying to set fire to a railway station in Bihar.

The protests to support Biharis in Maharashtra have thrown the whole railway apparatus in Bihar out of gear, thus greatly inconveniencing Biharis in Bihar.

In spite of efforts to divide the country, Indians, from Mumbai (left) to Motihari (right), have bravely shown that the bonds of stupidity tie us tightly together.

Earlier, Shiv Sena and MNS lumpen competed to beat up Biharis who had come for the railway recruitment exams in Mumbai. The two groups almost came to blows but eventually sorted out their differences peacefully in order to beat up the sleeping Biharis.